Update on My Mom • Prayers & Healing Energy Needed
Friday, August 28, 2009 at 1:28AM I got a call around midnight that my mom is in very critical condition again and the doctor said he wasn't sure she would make it this time and suggested I get the earliest flight to Ohio in the a.m.
I am in shock at the moment — numb and shakey from the news, panicked about getting packed and ready to leave in two hours for a flight; sad, scared, angry at this ARDS thing my mom has; angry and sad that I wasn't in Cleveland these past four days when my mom was more alert; and I'm embarassed to admit that I'm also little angry at the universe for inconveniencing me just when I was feeling finally "caught up" at home.
I am also feeling gratitude for Michael and his calm and giving ways of helping, for having my sister and my brother to talk and share this journey with, for the doctor returning my call at 1 a.m. and the calm way the ICU nurse answered our multiple phone calls, for having such flexibility in my schedule and such good support here that I can leave on a moment's notice...
Such a bundle of so many emotions.
I am experiencing a lot of fear, too, about my mom dying, about how hard this might be for her, how about the uncertainty of how long I will be in Ohio and if she is dying, how long will this last. Even with my fear, I am committed to standing in the intention I've had for the last week around this:
I declare that I am dearly loved and whole and complete in every moment. (I also declare this for all of us — my mom included.)
I declare that everything in life is here for our greatest growth and expansion and I trust and surrender to the life that everything is unfolding for the highest good of all.
I am keeping my eyes open for the learning in this. But it is hard as I just want to shut them and close down.
Still I am committed to stretching myself into the learning that I know is here for me if I can only be conscious and present enough to notice it.
I want my mom well. I hold the faith that healing is always happening, no matter what.
I also trust that there is love surrounding us on every step of our journey. I am praying that in every moment my mother can feel the grace of that love.
Sorry that there isn't a Flowering Friday this week. Will post more from Ohio. Thank you for your love, prayers and healing energy.
Reader Comments (10)
this IS a flowering of the HIGHEST DEEPEST kind...you are reminding all of us to stand in the LIFE That flowers eternally.....ever in thought with you and hugging you deeply so......here for whatever you need...love for you / your family.......love you shann......
Your strength and loving words are awe inspiring - stay with it.... love to you
I appreciate your honesty about everything here. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
P.S. You are brave and wise and an inspiration.
Shannon - so sorry to hear the news. Sending love and energy your way. Having recently lost my mom I can certainly relate. Remember though - she has nothing to fear. If it is indeed her time to go home - remember what a perfect and beautiful place she will return to. It is you and those who are left behind who have the hard part. You will be in my thoughts
Cheryl (from SM class)
I join the rest in holding you, your mom and the rest of your family in my heart, Shannon. Sending love...
Dear Shannon,
Please know that you and your family are in my prayers... that you, your Mom, your family receive Creator's blessings and love.
Bill
hey sweet shannon,
sending you, your mum and family so much love, gentleness and healings... may angels scoop you all up and keep you all safe in their love and energy...
giant hugs!
So sorry. May you find peace and calm today and may you know you are loved and supported.
Friends,
Thank you all for the prayers, kind words, love and light...It is felt and appreciated!
Mom is now more stable — so I will continue to practice patience and hold the intention that whatever happens my Mom can stand in the knowing that she is so loved and held on every step of her journey.
Love
Shannon
8/29/09